March 27, 2013

stranger needing help or a dangerous scam?

I posted this earlier on Instagram but wanted to talk a little more about it.

Here's what happened today: I answered the door to a young teen girl asking to come in because a guy was following her. I told her I couldn't help her, that I can't let strangers in my home.. and sent her on her way. Minutes later I felt guilty and called 911 alerting them of the situation.

I'm new to this "living in a house" business. We've been living in gated apartments in pretty safe areas before this house. We now live in a pretty safe neighborhood, or what I'd consider safe. We're by a school, there are lots of families and retired people near us. The city is pretty boring and safe. 

In the 6 months we've lived here we've had a handful of sketchy looking people trying to sell something or other. After the last time I told myself to stop answering the door at all. It's not safe, especially when I'm home alone with the boys. Today when the doorbell rang the first time, I didn't answer. The boys stood at the house door (our windows were open) yelling, "Daddy! Daddy!". They get so excited for people to come to the door.

I tried to hush them and take them into another room until whoever it was left. Our house has no front facing windows, I have no way of seeing who is outside besides the peep hole (which, let's face it, are pretty much pointless). We waited a few minutes and the doorbell rang again. I don't know WHY I went to the door. I'm going over this in my head over and over. I should have never answered the door to begin with. 

I don't feel bad about how I helped the girl who may or may not have been in trouble. I feel bad mostly for answering the door in the first place. I keep thinking over the situation and how it seemed suspicious now that I look back. Why didn't she just call 911 herself? Why wasn't she in school? We're the 4th house on the street, why our house? She did look nervous. What if it was a set up? What if she was a decoy, trying to scope out the house? What if someone was waiting who had a gun? What if someone is going to come back later to hurt/rob us?

I didn't want that girl anywhere near my house, even if someone was following her. I know it sounds bad, but I don't want that here. I called 911, I did my duty. But I don't want that here, not at my house, not where I'm with my babies. I didn't want to get any information from her, I didn't want her to wait anywhere, I just wanted her to go away. It feels so mean to say (if she really was in trouble) but that's how I felt. I wanted to protect us, and should have started with not even answering the door.

My mind is racing. I'm sure I'll kick myself for a while about this. I come from a small town, from a safe home. People leave their doors and cars unlocked. Now I'm a mama bear, and need to protect my babies and home in a very big city/area. Sometimes I need to turn off my trusting instinct. The thing is, if Chikezie was home, I probably would have answered the door. Actually, I have answered the door when he's home. 

I don't know. This whole situation just has me kind of shaken up. 

Have you faced a similar situation? How would you have handled it?

1 comment:

  1. I try not to answer the door either. We live in what i consider a safe, family friendly subdivision but our house is the one directly across from the stop sign when you enter the neighborhood. I have felt guilty in the past for not trusting peoples stories but the truth is you just can't be too safe these days...sad but true. You did the right thing by notifying authorities, right by your babies & the girl.

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