It had to happen sometime. And I thought, sooner rather than later. We finally did it. The pacies are gone. They had just started to become an obsession, a manipulation tool and the subject of many baby fights. I decided it was time to free our family from the pacies and hopefully help teach the boys that they can soothe themselves to sleep. That they don't need a pacifier. And that their bear and puppy to cuddle with are enough.
I think as parents, sometimes we think no crying baby means we're doing everything right. We stick in a pacifier because it'll make them stop crying instead of getting to the root of why they're really crying or whining in the first place, and teaching them ways to cope without the pacifier. I've learned a lot of diversion tricks during the day to keep our mind off of the pacifier. And I think I've been more in tune with them without the pacifiers during the day. But now we need to be done with them at night, too. Because the pacifier somehow ends up in mouths on days I'm tired or frustrated. I give in and it sets them back.
I cut the nipple off of the pacifiers and then let the boys see them. Julian was frustrated there wasn't anything to suck on, Isaiah just chewed on the end like normal. After they saw what their pacies had become, I took them away and now we're done. We put the boys to bed after a book last night with their lovies and a kiss goodnight. I was anxious about how the night would go but knew it wasn't about me being a "softie" for them, this is really what is best for them. They may not know it right now, but it is. And I'll be glad I did this now instead of in 6 months.
They cried and cried. Isaiah gave up after about 30 minutes and I couldn't stand to listen to Julian anymore so I went in to cuddle and calm him. After literally 2 minutes in my arms, I felt his head and arms go limp on my shoulders. He was asleep. I rocked him for 5 minutes hoping he'd be in a deeper sleep when I laid him down. But of course he woke up, looking for his paci when I put him down and his cry-clock was reset. He cried for another 30 minutes before falling asleep. In retrospect, I shouldn't have gone in there. I think he would have tired a little quicker if I would have just let him be.
And they slept all night.
Here is a quick little look at our memories with the pacies over the past year and a half.
Julian after his first bath.
Isaiah cuddling with Uncle Bryce by the fire after a day of swimming and fun outside.
Pacies in the dark and a little scary Long Beach Aquarium.
Pacies helping us brave the scary grass.
One of the many first fights over a paci.
Paci comforting Isaiah in a car ride to Grandma's on a freezing and snowy Christmas Day in Iowa. After our first long plane trip and very early morning. An exhausted boy.
Crying because the pacies are out of reach under the crib.
Trying to backwardly grab Julian's paci...even though he has his own.
A new stage of paci love comes in; the hoarding stage. Now he needs one in his hand as a back up even though there's on in his mouth.
Paci comforting Julian on a day he didn't feel so well.
And our final picture with a pacifier.
Peace out, Paci. Thanks for all your love and help over the past year and a half but now this relationship has become toxic. And we're too old for you.
Update: Now we're working on the first nap with no pacifier. 30 minutes in and both boys are still pissed off. They're just feeding off of each other and yelling. But the thing with twins is, I can't go in now because I'm alone. If I pick one boy up to soothe him, the other will be mad I'm not holding him. And as soon as I put them back down, the crying will start all over.
It's going to be a loooong day!