how to piss off a mama of twins

So I walked to Target with the boys this morning because we needed formula. After almost 7 months I'm finally getting used to people stopping me (literally every outing is about 4-5 stops). I'm really tired of it but know it's inevitable with twins. So I deal. I really don't mind people oohing and aahing over the boys as they walk by but the stopping just really gets old. 

Anyways.

This was probably the worst trip anywhere I've ever had with the boys. I usually just brush it all off and I know that people usually don't have negative intentions but this crap gets to you after awhile. I really need to think of some smart-ass comments to say to these people on the spot (which I usually think of after the fact and wish I could have said)

Idiot Interaction #1: 

Woman, pregnant daughter (my age) and little girl in shopping cart. They ooh and ahh over the boys and then as they walk past the older woman looks back at me and slithers, "poor thing!". Wait..what? Am I bleeding somewhere? Do I look like I've contracted some life threatening illness? Why poor thing? I am not unfortunate for having twins. I am BLESSED. Some people aren't even lucky enough to have ONE baby, and I know exactly how blessed I am that we didn't even have to try and had two. I am not a poor thing. If anything, her daughter was the poor thing! She had a 2 year old in the cart and another on the way....SHE is going to be busy, much much busier than I will be. 

I wish I could have said that, instead I replied with, "No way. I am blessed..and this is the best job in the world!"

Idiot Interaction #2: 

I get about an isle away from the first stupid comment and another lady stops me. (I get this one a lot) 

"Aww cute twins, are they identical?" 
"Nope. Not identical, they just look a lot alike"
"Are you sure?? They look identical to me."
"Yep. I'm sure." 

And then she proceeded to argue with me for about 5 minutes. I know to YOU they look a lot alike but I'm their mama and I know who is who and they are clearly not identical. Just brothers who happen to look similar. Don't argue with me about it. 

Interaction #3:

At the check out line, with a cashier we've seen MANY times before, and who has commented about the boys many times before. A woman in line was talking about the boys and how cute they were and the cashier chimes in, "And one on the way!" 

Uh, I know I have some more weight to lose lady but I'm not pregnant. Thanks for calling me fat though! I could feel how bad the women around me felt after that comment because every woman knows the cardinal rule of womanhood: NEVER, under any circumstances comment on a woman's pregnancy status unless they have already confirmed with you that they are in fact, pregnant. 

So, I'm walking out of Target now, completely annoyed at the stupidity and rudeness I'd witnessed in the past 20 minutes when along comes the topping on the cake:

Interaction #4:

I'm not even making eye contact with people at this point in hopes nobody will stop me. A woman (with a stroller) belts out as she walks by, "WOW! You have your hands FULL. I'm surprised you even got out of the house!!" 

........*smacks head* *briefly has images of tripping aforementioned woman and laughing at her face dive into the pavement* *thinks "Wow, I'm surprised you even LEFT the house! Eeek! You're scaring my children!"* 

But instead, I just kept on walking.

SERIOUSLY.


20 comments :

  1. I don't have twins but I do have a double stroller and I get stopped 4-5 times at every outting with people who THINK I have twins and then stop me to assure me that I don't in fact have twins (DUH!) and then proceed to tell me how cool my stroller is like they've never seen one before. Then I get the same "poor you" lines about how hard it must be and blah blah blah. GETS SO OLD! I try my hardest to smile and be friendly but I wish people would just keep their thoughts in their head and quit wasting my precious time. Don't they know that I am pressed for time EVERY time I leave the house and the 30 seconds they steal to say something retarded to me is 30 seconds I DON'T HAVE!

    I feel your pain. Though the whole identical/not identical thing would make my blood boil! I don't even know how you deal with that one!

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  2. OH MY! I am so sorry you had a bad day! I know that I only have 1 baby, and I get looks and stuff a lot because people think that i'm a teenager! ha! I was at work and this woman saw my wedding ring and TOLD ME that i was too young to be married. UMM no I'm not I'm 23 years old with a son and one more one the way. I am allowed to be married thank you very much! You just have to let it roll off your back, as hard as it may be, because people are so stupid and thoughtless sometimes! The good thing is that you were classy about the whole thing and didn't make a snarky comment and make yourself look bad. Good job and keep your head up! :)

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  3. LOVE it.....well not love the stupid people, but know EXACTLY what you're talking about!!! The identical question is a little different for me, but there are a lot of people stupid enough to ask if mine are identical!!!! I used just say "no" but now Im sooo sick of people being so stupid, I just say "Ones a boy, and ones a girl." Hoping the understand how stupid they're question was. Even though they pry already knew that since Jersey is always in pink and Jameson always in very boy looking clothes. (I make sure of that any time we leave the house) But thats my answer anymore even thats not what I really wanna say to them!

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  4. people are so dumb! target must have been having a sale on snuggies or something for all those idiots to be shopping there at once!

    and im sure, you dont even look pregnant! dumb. dumb. dumb.

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  5. Yes there are silly and I hate to say, stupid ,people out there. I have three girls all really close in age {20 months apart and then 15 months} and I have been stopped and asked if I have triplets and I still get asked if the two younger ones are twins. And why do they always have to ask me if I am sure?!?! The "Boy! You have your hands full!" is my all time favorite comment and I always reply that "I would not have it any other way!" ~ you should see some of the glance I get after that retort!

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  6. yeah I don't know how you do it, I would have snapped. Especially since it happens so often. When I see twins I usually am just omg what cuties! Yes you have two. but it's better to have two the same that two at different stages your definitely right about the first woman.. holy crap that is going to be me.

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  7. soooo good! I generally try to avoid eye contact with strangers when out with my boys but often it's difficult. my favourite was when I was pregnant, how many times people said "oh you're going to be busy/tired/have your hands full". Oh really?! That thought hadn't crossed my mind, thanks for pointing that out. In fact I often wondered if people were actually TRYING to be mean and make me worry about howwwww harrrrrd it was going to be. I swear I got more comments of sympathy than congrats when I told people it was twins. Little do they know how blessed we really are!!

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  8. My friend has 6 month old boy girl twins, and even she gets asked if they are identical.....Serisouly?!?!?!?

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  9. i seriously could have written this post myself. there are stupid people every where. i used to get so angry with people who would ARGUE with me about whether or not my kids were identical. before we found out, people would always insist they were identical and i was wrong. now that i know they're identical, people insist they're fraternal! it's ridiculous. dna tests do not lie. sometimes i struggle to shrug it all off but i have to remind myself that most of them just mean well and don't know what else to say. i've gotten pretty good at smiling through anger. :)

    keep your chin up and don't let the idiots get you down!

    --Alex
    http://twolittlehornes.blogspot.com

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  10. Wow and I thought I got a lot of weird comments having a dog in the store, but thankfully none that rude!!

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  11. Gotta love people who have no filter... We don't have twins yet but we do have three kiddos and two puppies so we get our fair share of sympathy nods and "wow, you have your hands full" comments... Really do they think I haven't heard this before or that I care what their observation is... I'd rather have my life full than feeling like I missed out somewhere along the way... Chaos is humbling. Your twins are adorable btw!
    Blessings.
    j
    www.gfinkfamily.blogspot.com
    Beneath the Acacia Tree

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  12. I know exactly how you feel. I always have people stop and talk about my twin boys. My husband finally got so tired of it one day when someone asked if our boys were twins. He looked at the lady and told her that no we liked one so much we had him cloned. The lady did not know what to say.
    Sorry people are so rude.

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  13. AW that sucks! Hope you ended up having a good day! I love your attitude and the way you handled it! YOU ARE BLESSED!

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  14. I have 3 kids, two years between each. I hear a lot of the same comments. ---You have your hands full. That must be a challenge. You must be so worn out. You're a busy Momma. (I don't know one who isn't!)--- And then when I tell people I homeschool; you wouldn't believe what I hear. It does get annoying sometimes. People at the store are the worst. I try to bite my tongue and I'm not one for confrontation. However, I get upset when my children apologize to someone for being in the way and that person ignores them or makes a face.... ooooh, I get mad! Recently, my son said excuse to a woman because he was looking at something. Honestly, an adult wouldn't have said anything at all. The woman looked at him and waited for him to move and then rolled her eyes. Yep, she sure did! I couldn't keep my mouth shut. "Please do not dismiss my son; he was looking at that and moved for YOU! Do NOT be rude to my child!" Yes, I said that... I'm usually quiet, but I was pissed. I can handle it okay when people are stupid or rude to me, but don't disrespect my kids! ;)

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  15. Ugh! I've blogged about this before. Seriously, it's amazing how much attention twins attract. I once went to the store with just one of the twins (left the other one home with the hubby) and I was amazed--no one gave us a second glance. It was kinda nice!

    You have those people who will actually stop you to ooh and ah, those people who stop you to offer some sage advice, or their own experience with twins, people that stop you to ask dumb questions, and then you have those people who don't stop you, but talk about you as they pass by (like you can't hear what they are saying). People never cease to amaze me! One day on our walk my friend and I literally counted 14 different people who commented, or otherwise acknowledged us. Unreal! Get over it, people. It's a double stroller with two babies in it!

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  16. Ugh! People are so predictable! I have had the EXACT same conversation with people insisting our boys look identical. Please don't argue with me! On the reverse; when people tell me how different the boys look, I instantly love them.

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  17. This is ALL ridiculous...and I grew up in the south. Yep. Ridiculous.

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  18. oh my gosh ... that Target lady one is the worst! did you at least say something to that? I had a guy at church ask me the other day if we were expecting a third ... and oh, he will probably never comment on that again b/c he was super embarrassed at how I responded. Sorry I'm a bit fat, but no ... not pregnant!

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  19. People have no clue!!! What were your responses to them?

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